Do you have a link? I am not sure what it is they are laughing about?
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Soyteen Liker's Blog
- Thread starter chudchudchudchud
- Start date
The fact that this thread is featured with the text about "man world vagina, women world penis"
Shit realized i posted it in the wrong thread but you get me
She won albeit
Oh really. I’m into it.
Yesterday I went to best buy to get a new gaming laptop after like 8 years for an early Christmas present because my old one was really big and cumbersome to carry out and was really slow, which made HOI4 take a gorillion years to load up which sucks cuz I wanted to learn to play it. I still haven't played it doe cuz I had another insomnia episode last night and couldn't really focus. But I do really like my laptop so far, it looks a lot nicer, the keyboard is a lot better to type with due to it being smaller, and Windows 11 seems alright so far. I ultimately decided against running a Linux distro because my cousin told me I had to decide which one to boot every time I opened it + most games have a problem with anticheat and Linux apparently. After that I got wingstop, half my order was garlic parmesan and the other was lemon pepper because I don't like spicy food.
Here are the specs to my computer, I would like to try rainbow six siege on it later, it seems like gaming will be more fun once I get off my meds and stabilize myself more. Hell, maybe Fortnite could be fun too. The reason I didn't get a desktop was because there's no space in my room for one. My vision is already sharper and brighter with lowering my meds and taking supplements that make lowering them smoother.
Here are the specs to my computer, I would like to try rainbow six siege on it later, it seems like gaming will be more fun once I get off my meds and stabilize myself more. Hell, maybe Fortnite could be fun too. The reason I didn't get a desktop was because there's no space in my room for one. My vision is already sharper and brighter with lowering my meds and taking supplements that make lowering them smoother.
I haven't been doing much of note lately besides drawing because I like to play with my phone's digital pen until it makes me want to draw characters I like. I also wrote something but I'm giving it time before posting it here because intuition.
The orange one is Mymy from Ongezellig and the one in the dress is Himeson (princess Cobson)
I've been rather stressed lately because my mom has been home all day for the past few days and her presence makes me anxious so I've been drinking coffee and matcha and when that fails, I take benzos but I don't want to overdo these things in case i get addicted. I actually went to some stores with my dad today and dollar tree had these gaming headphones that were only 7 dollars and I was like "No way, that can't possibly be true, can it?" So I bought them and they were actually really good, better than the $60+ headphones I had before because the new ones are more comfy, better music quality, and better voice chat quality. I also got a journal with some Christian quotes to write down why I need to follow God as a quick-hand for those times when one of the entities in my head alters my memory and makes me forget.
I wrote an update to the document I wrote about the entities with some new sections and some editing to make it seem less like a jarring shitpost. I'm wondering if anyone has any thoughts on it because I wanted to see my general doctor to get a referral to a body-based healing treatment but the general doctor had no available appointments. I think I might know enough about my psyche at this point to heal without being completely bewildered, but there's still probably other shocking things hidden that might catch me off guard. Hence, why I write is to have a top-down (mental/thinking-based) approach to support what will be the bottom-up approach (physical/body-based).
I'd like to apologize for some of the more unsavory things I've said and done in the past. I can't quite undo them, but I don't think I should kill myself either. Hopefully I might be able to join OCIA later in September and eventually confess to a priest but my mom threatened to undo my progress with getting off my aripiprazole because she thinks I'm a schizophrenic because I keep having stress responses around her. She wants to put me back on 30mg but hopefully I can evade this.
I wrote an update to the document I wrote about the entities with some new sections and some editing to make it seem less like a jarring shitpost. I'm wondering if anyone has any thoughts on it because I wanted to see my general doctor to get a referral to a body-based healing treatment but the general doctor had no available appointments. I think I might know enough about my psyche at this point to heal without being completely bewildered, but there's still probably other shocking things hidden that might catch me off guard. Hence, why I write is to have a top-down (mental/thinking-based) approach to support what will be the bottom-up approach (physical/body-based).
I'd like to apologize for some of the more unsavory things I've said and done in the past. I can't quite undo them, but I don't think I should kill myself either. Hopefully I might be able to join OCIA later in September and eventually confess to a priest but my mom threatened to undo my progress with getting off my aripiprazole because she thinks I'm a schizophrenic because I keep having stress responses around her. She wants to put me back on 30mg but hopefully I can evade this.
You did groom him
That's 'sault btw
No I didn't, I broke up with him because I had a gigantic AAP attack and didn't want to bother him with that shit nor be the "uwu im a ftm dating a straight man but im a man too!" stereotype. I cut contact with him because I was advised that men don't like complex ex-relationship situations. I genuinely do not want to bother people with trans stuff anymore and I've been trying to heal and even write posts against transgenderism. It's just one of my fascinations but the thing about Minuteman is that I was still in the depths of being a misguided de-facto atheist. I had few morals back then. And I know your post is probably a joke but since people are going to take it seriously anyway just to fuck with me: I want to ask you this: Do you really think I mean to seriously hurt him for sadistic pleasure? Do you think I really want more autogynephiles when I have struggled immensely with my autoandrophilia? Do you really think I had some kind of problem with him that makes me want to hurt him? Do you sincerely think I want more trannies in women's spaces? Can I really not be forgiven for being misguided? It's not that I was some kind of weird dominatrix groomer, I've literally been at the verge of transitioning quite often myself - why wouldn't I have tried to guide him if I wanted to be guided myself?
I said a lot of disgusting things around him but even if nobody forgives me, I hope God will. I just wish I could apologize sincerely and make up for it.
Words words words
Hamass_2
Registered Member
ex 'teens say this but the sharty is kinda becoming mainstream and its hard to avoid it after its recent events from last year.
Thousand year soy reich imminent
I will say it is, I’m seeing sharty memes more often on Twitter. What I meant though was more so that chudchud shouldn’t straight up go to the site, or should avoid associating with figureheads. I get that she cant go her whole life never seeing a Cobson again
Nice to see everyone again. I've been trying to get in the habit of praying every day and it seems to be giving me a sense of peace and connection to God. In particular, I borrowed the rosary my parents had in my mom's car and did the 'Divine Mercy' prayer after someone I briefly talked to recommended I do it. I've also been recommended to do the standard prayer of the Rosary but it seems kind of time consuming for someone who isn't accustomed to praying yet. I was kind of worried today for personal reasons I don't want to talk about here but trying to find and strengthen faith seems to help a lot. I really disliked being rather mindless and careless in the past but it's alright, I think I can develop a coherent and life-affirming worldview now that I never quite could before, but it's not like I really believed in myself enough to try. It really never is genuinely "too late" or "impossible" to self-improve and repent if one genuinely tries to.
But in other news, today was my dad's birthday and he wanted a watch as a gift so we went to a mall and got him one as well as a hair tie for me but I need to use a hair relaxer first because my hair has been growing and getting nappy again. He seemed to like his gift thankfully. I was thinking of reading a manga called 'Oyasumi (Goodbye) Punpun' but I knew I wasn't ready for it yet because even hearing it would get highly depressing made me feel sad. I almost never consume fictional media in general honestly and I wanted to change that but the problem with me is that I often swing between not caring at all about it and getting so into it that I get overwhelmed and need to stop to stim to calm down. Usually the not caring part wins though. But even then, I get a lot of analysis paralysis on what to watch/read/play and spend more time browsing than actually consuming fiction.
Here are some I had saved for later but the app I use (Kotatsu) seems kinda glitchy and sometimes displays a wildly different chapter count than the actual manga or sometimes gives me a 403 error and won't let me read it at all. Oh well, at least today was mostly good.
But in other news, today was my dad's birthday and he wanted a watch as a gift so we went to a mall and got him one as well as a hair tie for me but I need to use a hair relaxer first because my hair has been growing and getting nappy again. He seemed to like his gift thankfully. I was thinking of reading a manga called 'Oyasumi (Goodbye) Punpun' but I knew I wasn't ready for it yet because even hearing it would get highly depressing made me feel sad. I almost never consume fictional media in general honestly and I wanted to change that but the problem with me is that I often swing between not caring at all about it and getting so into it that I get overwhelmed and need to stop to stim to calm down. Usually the not caring part wins though. But even then, I get a lot of analysis paralysis on what to watch/read/play and spend more time browsing than actually consuming fiction.
Here are some I had saved for later but the app I use (Kotatsu) seems kinda glitchy and sometimes displays a wildly different chapter count than the actual manga or sometimes gives me a 403 error and won't let me read it at all. Oh well, at least today was mostly good.
I wish I could believe in God.
God bless you chudchudchudchud, glad to hear things are going well for you.
God bless you chudchudchudchud, glad to hear things are going well for you.
I like Soyteen Liker (๑´• .̫ •ू`๑)
I've sort of been in a rut lately. I feel like my online friendships are lacking in some regard so thankfully my mom said she might take me to bars and pubs for my 21st birthday. She told me most of the guys there would be old but *hopefully* I can find at least someone my age. I went to church again yesterday with her and she was so bored that she started playing mobile games on her phone. There was nobody my age there either I think.
I even got a nice dress to go to the bars/pubs but I'd need to fix the upper part because my upper body is a lot shorter compared to my legs. I was thinking of trying to get into more fiction but I keep stalling again. I get frustrated a lot with fiction because I either get bored or overwhelmed like I've said before. Maybe I could read either something like The Chronicles of Narnia or TADC fanfiction because TADC has the right amount of emotional intensity for me. But I'm hesitant because I know fanfiction tends to add LGBT stuff and it's already technically a LGBT show because Zooble is nonbinary but I assume fanfiction would add stuff like "Jax is a transwoman and repressing his identity!" or other angsty LGBT stuff.
Additionally, reading fiction might help me develop action more in my stories. So far they tend to be extremely monologue-ish and/or dialogue-ish, I had an idea for a ragebait story that is meant to strengthen the opposite of what the narrator is saying. The idea was started by a terrible book called "Females" by that same transwoman who got quoted saying sissy pornography made him transition.
I thought the idea behind someone who genuinely liked the idea of being a woman but for some weird twisted psychoanalysis was strangely fascinating. This is taken from Wikipedia:
I kind of wanted to do something similar myself, a narrator that monologues about how in her warped idea of masculinity, men are awesome because of what she calls "pornification" - and that everyone can become male because in her warped mind, a male is anyone who is addicted to pornifying things. The whole book would be about this central concept of pornification, and the thing about it is that it has nothing to do with men at all and instead is a glimpse of an extremely dismal and evil worldview about how things can always get more twisted/decayed - and that's supposedly a good thing because it's "inevitable" and "trying to heal from pain only brings about more misery"
I was terribly afraid of the idea being misinterpreted though so I wrote a counter-monologue which I think ruined it because it felt too... anvilicious. I may re-do it some time in the future. I think it has potential if it inspires one to fight against everything it stands for.
I even got a nice dress to go to the bars/pubs but I'd need to fix the upper part because my upper body is a lot shorter compared to my legs. I was thinking of trying to get into more fiction but I keep stalling again. I get frustrated a lot with fiction because I either get bored or overwhelmed like I've said before. Maybe I could read either something like The Chronicles of Narnia or TADC fanfiction because TADC has the right amount of emotional intensity for me. But I'm hesitant because I know fanfiction tends to add LGBT stuff and it's already technically a LGBT show because Zooble is nonbinary but I assume fanfiction would add stuff like "Jax is a transwoman and repressing his identity!" or other angsty LGBT stuff.
Additionally, reading fiction might help me develop action more in my stories. So far they tend to be extremely monologue-ish and/or dialogue-ish, I had an idea for a ragebait story that is meant to strengthen the opposite of what the narrator is saying. The idea was started by a terrible book called "Females" by that same transwoman who got quoted saying sissy pornography made him transition.
I thought the idea behind someone who genuinely liked the idea of being a woman but for some weird twisted psychoanalysis was strangely fascinating. This is taken from Wikipedia:
I kind of wanted to do something similar myself, a narrator that monologues about how in her warped idea of masculinity, men are awesome because of what she calls "pornification" - and that everyone can become male because in her warped mind, a male is anyone who is addicted to pornifying things. The whole book would be about this central concept of pornification, and the thing about it is that it has nothing to do with men at all and instead is a glimpse of an extremely dismal and evil worldview about how things can always get more twisted/decayed - and that's supposedly a good thing because it's "inevitable" and "trying to heal from pain only brings about more misery"
I was terribly afraid of the idea being misinterpreted though so I wrote a counter-monologue which I think ruined it because it felt too... anvilicious. I may re-do it some time in the future. I think it has potential if it inspires one to fight against everything it stands for.
Porn is the result of maleness. Porn is the result of destructive energy.
Porn is perversion, but perversion is good because ideas such as loss, violation, and misery can feel good. If even the thing that started off as the worst thing ever (destructive energy) can be twisted into being good, why can’t everything else? Nature is a decaying force that cannot be reversed. You can’t un-rape someone, but you can make them believe that rape is deserved and even so sexy that it becomes a source of transcendent joy rather than pain.
Porn is literally the best thing ever. There is no truth, and trying to find any only brings about more pain. Hence, this is why manhood – and by extension, porn is awesome. Intimacy and vulnerability on the other hand, is terrible. You can’t ever truly know someone. And why would you want to? All you’d find is lesser or greater degrees of maleness and destructive energy. That’s all a human is, maleness and the denial of maleness.
Porn is perversion, but perversion is good because ideas such as loss, violation, and misery can feel good. If even the thing that started off as the worst thing ever (destructive energy) can be twisted into being good, why can’t everything else? Nature is a decaying force that cannot be reversed. You can’t un-rape someone, but you can make them believe that rape is deserved and even so sexy that it becomes a source of transcendent joy rather than pain.
Porn is literally the best thing ever. There is no truth, and trying to find any only brings about more pain. Hence, this is why manhood – and by extension, porn is awesome. Intimacy and vulnerability on the other hand, is terrible. You can’t ever truly know someone. And why would you want to? All you’d find is lesser or greater degrees of maleness and destructive energy. That’s all a human is, maleness and the denial of maleness.
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