I am going insane because my day to day starts to bleed into one another and each day feels like the same song and dance and I need things to change but even when I make those steps and do things outside of the screen that I keep to myself things eventually come undone after so long, maybe that's just how life is - but it's tiring. I'm stubborn and will keep living another day just to see what happens next, but I'm honestly exhausted. I'm just venting, mind vomit and all but I couldn't imagine life being eternal, the thought is scarier than death.