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watching this rn

Weird, I don't think I've gone a single night in years without dreaming. Maybe one or two times at most, but try to fix your sleep schedule. I've been trying to myself.

:story:

I had several false awakening loop dreams in a row, it's been awhile since it's happened and I'm always lucid as they occur. The false awakening loop will usually happen more than ten times before I wake up for real, I remember during the second loop I was sitting in my dream version of my...

my gimmicks will always be edgy cunt shit

I'm exhausted and stayed awake all night, took Benadryl and melatonin so if I'm a bit unresponsive for several hours that will be why.

I recently got into like disturbing last audio clips and there was one I listened to where there's no video but it's this dude who was obsessed with bears and wild life and he would get too fucking close for comfort with bears and eventually brought his wife on a trip with him and he camped near...

but why

pls no bully

It honestly just makes sense and lmao it'll be fun it's not homosexually driven

I noticed earlier

something something us

I keep telling myself I'll deep clean my room and do something about my mess of hair but I haven't really wanted to do much of anything, motivation is a bitch but I want to gain the energy to do more stuff since I've had projects I've been sitting on like my visual novel which I have the ability...

Currently fighting off the tired feeling from Benadryl I took since my allergies were acting up, wasn't abusing it this time but I've also been awake for well over twenty hours and I feel so exhausted but might make coffee - I hope everyone else has been doing well.

you see I'm not into allat

I am going insane because my day to day starts to bleed into one another and each day feels like the same song and dance and I need things to change but even when I make those steps and do things outside of the screen that I keep to myself things eventually come undone after so long, maybe...

I've been playing this game the past few days, actually a lot of fun once you start figuring out what it's asking of you and where you need to look, there's so much to find and I like the gimmicks it has where you can have a digital pet, change your cursor, download music and so forth. I'm going...

Besides my vague description I would go into it blind, it's more of an experience. I love when I find pieces of media like this because they're rare finds and within my taste since for some reason my pretentious nature draws me to pieces of art like this, I'm honestly surprised it went under my...

prostitute dolls in a world where humans no longer exist where they are no longer needed.

I ran across this anime, which was also touched by the writer for serial experiment's lain which made sense to me with the way that it ended and it's visuals but I wanted to share it here since it's a piece of media that's just really neat to me and there's three episodes. There's also a strange...

I decided to go through with the name change just for fun, I haven't really had much to post about since besides being banned on most social media platforms I try to join for dumb reasons I've been existing silently, going through a lot of mental decay and lacking motivation to feel the desire...

( all of the favorite users are all me right ? )

Like - the feeling of suddenly falling and jolting awake from the feeling? If so, many times, I'll sometimes even hallucinate / have a very fast dream that I fell down some stairs or tripped and will instantly jolt awake with the feeling that I fell down, no pain but it's a really weird phantom...

lucid dream wouldn't negatively effect it, everything would still be cinematic and movie like, but you'd be in it. When I lucid dream for instance I'll actually fly around or levitate and the feeling of it is otherworldly, it's a whole new dynamic of rules / senses that shouldn't make sense or...

I remember how weird it felt too, like a weird pressure in my palm when I tried pushing my finger through it since I had to kind of wiggle my finger around in my palm since I think my brain even in the lucid dream was refusing to let it happen easily since it probably knows it's not natural and...

Yes, for some reason mine are always very atmospheric in nature - though always in a low quality kind of way, where everything is usually like being in a pitch black house. I had a false awakening where I remember waking up in the living room, but everything was darker than it should had been...

I love david lynch but it's just something I think about a lot because of how I dream quite literally every night - and even to this day scientists don't entirely understand it either, but it's weird how we can lucid dream, being inside a dream scape while aware our bodies are outside of...

I actually have screen shot proof of this happening, where I told somebody about a dream I had of my house burning down - and just three months after the dream I had and the message I sent, my house actually did burn down - almost died in it like in the dream, and I was able to have a screen...

Dreams are weird, how do our brains come up with these things? It's just interesting to me how we can exist somewhere else when we are asleep - I know not everyone dreams and there's even people who don't believe lucid dreaming is real, even though it's been proven - but that sounds like a...

assert dominance piss everywhere but jesus, that sounds scary lmao. For some reason I can never see the sleep paralysis entity since it's always almost purposefully out of my line of view every time and the most I'd see is just a dark figure with no features, sleep paralysis is interesting to...

I've been in the middle of watching this.

Lately I've taken a pause with the VN since I need more money and time to do the things I want to do with it, but it's still something I plan to work on during free time I've been busy lately with other things, including fashion and reading / writing which will also help when I get back around...

Oh have you not had sleep paralysis before - or? Most sleep paralysis occurrences people feel like something heavy is on their chest, but a lot of people report different feelings or sounds during sleep paralysis, for me I've always felt a figure climb into bed just out of view even when I was...

My usual check in, haven't really had much to mind vomit about since there hasn't been much going on upstairs with me to begin with for some time now but I hope everyone is doing well - still around, but just nothing to really post about since it's the usual cycle. I did get my glasses, it's...

i mean sure i'm a little retarded but i'm self aware of it

why do people actually believe I'm retarded tf

kaine moment

Personally I don't have issues with anyone on this website or off site, besides people from my past I've discussed but besides everything I've had relatively pleasant and chill conversations with everyone for the most part and just am glad there's a space on the web like this, everyone's been...

Wouldn't be the first time for me

Did I do something to piss you off or something lol

not anymore since I'm a shut in, but I did in the past. I prefer the quiet lifestyle now. never drink water never really go outside never get sunlight stay in a dark room 20 hours a day eat potato chips for dinner never eat red meat tbh I need to do better

I'm going to assume you never went through this entire thread with all my lore, which I can't blame you since this thread is super long lmfao - pretty sure it's been mentioned before but a few years ago I went through a massive house fire which was started by my downstairs neighbor and I almost...

old pic of me that's several years old now before my house fire before I turned into a rotting corpse who no longer gets much sunlight. I still fucking miss that woojer device though, shit was so good for music and got it for free by the company.

Idk whenever I go out I'm told I smell nice I use a lot of skin care products and I have an array collection of different scents since for some reason I just like having a list of products for my skin and hair and body, I always have a honey almond vanilla spray for my hair which I brush a few...

who is this guy

I try to shower at least once every three or four days, in the past I showered at least once sometimes twice a day but then depression shit and I just don't bother as much especially since it's not like I do much to begin with to get dirty.

I've never even understood what the problem seems to be between this person and I because usually the only people who beef with me are troons or other minorities I've pissed off. this reminds me I should shower

what the fuck are you on about :story:

Agreed - I don't understand why it isn't like this to begin with. I know people would argue "lol you're trying to justify murder." but that can also be said about these protestors who should also be held for attempted murder because whose to say there aren't people with life threatening...

Honestly agreed about this, have had the same thoughts for some time now. I don't drive myself, but could imagine how serious it must be trying to get to work so you're not late - or what if somebody was on their way to a hospital, or funeral?

did you just refer to me as a pet

who

I hate that the fanbase for a lot of popular games like Undertale and Deltarune are cringe because overall I enjoyed Undertale, it's nostalgia bait but it works - then again I love a lot of indie games, including harder to stomach stories like Lisa and Lisa the painful. I haven't played through...

Whoever is messaging him is going schizo and he's just upset about it since people always go on the attack with me, but it's always people who we both recognize to be far worse than I am - but I also don't think it even needs to be mentioned here since the people who don't like me will always...

TLDR I'm pretty sure somebody is telling @Kenopsia lies about me if we regard the screen shots and more individuals are trying to convince him I'm too mentally unstable to be friends with, even though most people who say these things about me are more often than not x10 more degenerate than I...

The last dream I had I thought it was a real movie trailer when I woke up, but after awhile I realized it had been just a dream - in the dream I kept seeing a face of an older women grinning - ( just the face, no body ) and it would appear in random places, under the bed, under the couch, in a...

I also contacted Kaine again ( he accepted the request within moments ) - the person whose stalked me since the early days of the internet when we were both kids in the same Facebook communities, and I have a feeling that I probably won't hear from him again - at least not for a few years, which...

I'm sorry I haven't really been around much - I have been tired, and since I don't have my social platforms I've just kind of been doing some behind the screen hobbies, including a bit more of reading and exploring lucid dreaming once again - I've been trying different types of teas and things...

anyways goodnight

Later today I'm going to an eye care clinic so long as I don't oversleep but I'll finally have glasses which I've needed for some time since my vision is honestly dog shit, I need to start getting better sleep and considered looking into a sleep clinic since they could maybe prescribe something...

It was for sure a blessing in disguise because while I could have deactivated the account myself - the following I had was too enticing, so I continued to play with it and push the limits, but for years that Facebook account has been used against me by different individuals over the years to dig...

I'm not even kidding - the fucking post the page made about me had hundreds of likes / comments, all discussing how my body should be used if I think saying "my body your choice" is an okay statement, but it just proves how retarded they are because just by me making a CNC joke they instantly...

This creature.

Oh, well technically speaking I have a list of people I'd consider my own personal lolcows - typically weird troons on Facebook who would always attempt to beef with me, there's one troon page that had 60k followers and they made a post about me, and there was thousands of comments of mentally...

gegbvil?

Yeah, tbh it ended up not being a complete bad thing - because unhinged cunts on Facebook would go as far as to harass my family who have nothing to do with my antics, and would even send me nasty stuff like animal gore, as if that's less worse than me making rage bait posts aimed at...

My Facebook account and my Instagram account got terminated today, and I feel like this was a targeted ordeal by a certain group of people. I'm sure people will see this as a win against me, but regardless of having probably lost some photos and old nostalgic posts I can still just continue to...

I think images are broken again

I have no idea what's going on but I hope everyone is okay and doing well. I've been sick again the past several days but I set up an appointment for an eye clinic and will be getting my eyes looked at, as well as a pair of glasses in a few days - something I've needed to do for a few years now...

sorry

idk why I decorated that post so much ew

Today was such a pleasant day, for once I had fun in the sun. I went to the mall today since I haven't really been going out as often as I probably should and I had a pleasant time, the weather was beautiful and I've been doing a lot more with myself behind the monitor - at least compared to...

I almost kicked my roommate out over it because it was almost an every night thing with new dudes walking into my house that I didn't even know, was gross and uncomfortable.

I once had a whore roommate who kept bringing in dudes from dating sites and they'd literally keep me wake all night with the wall bashing noises.

This conversation reminded me about how during the early 2000's of the web there was somebody who would send me emails back and forth, - to this day I still don't know who it was - I've talked about this person often in the past, and he had two alt email accounts that went by "acrylic eyes", and...

True - I've just had people moral fag me and call me weird for checking out gore from time to time but it already exists, me just consuming it out of morbid curiosity doesn't hurt anyone.

Yeah, I saw gore/shock sites as young as nine or ten years old. I think it's part of the result of who I am today, since I grew up to be desensitized to just about everything - I've never seen a problem with edgy content, because at the end of the day it doesn't hurt anybody - most it serves to...